Michael's Blog

Stupid, funny things.

28 March 2006

Suicide Note

Microsoft Word is one of the most annoying programs ever invented. I try really hard not to use it because I know using it will somehow come back to haunt me. Anyone who has used it extensively knows how annoying it is and if you do use it and you are thinking "Man this guy doesn't know what he is talking about." then you must have had someone go through and set the settings so that when it got to you then it wasn't annoying, or you just haven't used a program that wasn't annoying before and so you don’t know the difference.

One of the most annoying things about MS Word is Mr. clip. You know what I am talking about. The little clip guy that would pop up out of nowhere and ask you if you needed help. “Do you need help saving a file?” “Do you need help making a webpage?” Clip is absolutely worthless. When it pops up you never want him to and when you did need help the answers it came up with didn't help at all.

One day I ran into a joke. I think it was an e-mail. The e-mail had an attachment about clip. I rolled when I saw it. This was the joke.

Anyone who remembers the clip would think it was funny. I thought it was so I sent it off to all of my family and friends. Including my grandparents who I thought used word enough to know about clip.

Later that day, I walked into my apartment and found my grandparents there. They started asking me if I was all right and where I had been. They had received my e-mail and thought I was going to kill myself. They hopped in their car and raced to Rexburg to try and find me and talk me out of it.

I asked them why they thought I would kill myself, and my grandma simply said “You just never know.” I asked why they didn't get the joke but they just said that they didn't get it and that I shouldn't joke about that ever again.

The moral of the story, Microsoft Word will ALWAYS screw you, so never use it, even if you are only using it as the subject of a joke.

14 March 2006


A Million Ways to Be Cruel